What Happens at an A.A. Meeting

How different are two AA meetings from each other?

Groups have personalities, and they are not all going to suit everybody. A room that suits somebody at first can be outgrown without any drama. The same format in a different room can feel like a different fellowship.

How do I find the right room when I get to the building?

Most venues host the meeting in a hall or basement with its own entrance. Members standing outside before the hour are the most reliable sign of the right door. There is no reception to check in with, which is less daunting than it sounds.

Do I need to bring anything to an AA meeting?

Coming empty-handed is not merely allowed, it is standard. Water and coffee tend to be available without charge. The only thing worth bringing is a willingness to sit for an hour.

What actually happens when you walk into an AA meeting?

Rooms vary, but the shape is almost always a reading, then sharing, then a close. Sharing goes around or by raised hand, and passing when it reaches you is completely normal. Nobody in the room was born knowing how any of it worked either.

Will anyone talk to me at my first meeting?

Somebody usually says hello, and a short answer closes the conversation politely. Questions about drinking, history or reasons are not part of the custom. Most people find the attention less than they feared and the welcome more than they expected.

Do I have to say I am an alcoholic?

A visitor can sit for an hour without saying a word, name included. The traditional phrase belongs to members who chose it rather than to newcomers. A first name is the most anyone is ever asked for.

Who runs an AA meeting?

Nobody in the room holds credentials for being there, and nobody claims any. Groups vote on their own format, their own hour and their own rent. Members run it because there is nobody else to run it.

Will I be asked to read something out loud?

Some rooms hand out a card to read at the start, and declining is normal. Nobody is tested on reading, and nobody minds a stumble. Volunteering later is always an option.

How does anonymity work for somebody just visiting?

Who was in the room is not something members discuss elsewhere. Nothing is shared with any employer, court or family member by anybody in the room. Talking about the ideas afterward is fine, and naming the people is not.

Do I have to speak at an AA meeting?

The word in the rooms for saying nothing is passing, and it gets used constantly. Members who have been sober for decades still sit through meetings in silence. A visitor who says nothing has done nothing wrong.

What is crosstalk in an AA meeting?

Crosstalk means answering or addressing another person's share, and rooms avoid it. The custom protects a newcomer most, because nothing said gets picked apart. It is the single most useful thing to understand about the hour.

What is the basket at an AA meeting for?

What goes in the basket stays with the group and covers what the group spends. No record is kept of individual contributions, because there is no membership to track. Self-support is the principle, and the basket is just how it happens.

What are the rules about phones in a meeting?

Most rooms ask for phones on silent and leave it at that. Smokers tend to arrive early and leave last, which is where the talking happens. Leaving the room for air is always available.

Can I go to a meeting if I am going to be late?

Latecomers arrive throughout the hour in most meetings and the room barely registers it. A share in progress is the one thing worth not interrupting on the way to a chair. A seat near the door makes a late arrival almost invisible.

How many people are at a typical AA meeting?

A handful of people is a meeting, and so is a packed hall. Numbers at any one meeting swing with the weather and the season. Nothing in a listing predicts how many chairs will be full.

What is on the literature table at a meeting?

Groups buy literature out of the basket and hand it to newcomers for nothing. Audio versions exist, which helps people who would rather listen than read. A newcomer leaflet is normally free, and the books are sold at close to cost.

Why do people mention how long they have been sober?

Members mention how long they have been sober as a frame for what they are about to say. What anybody says about their own time is theirs to decide. Not following the counting on a first visit is entirely ordinary.

What are the jobs people do at a meeting?

The jobs around a meeting are unpaid, short-term and taken in turn. A job can be given up at any point without difficulty. Nothing about it requires experience.

Should I take a phone number if somebody offers one?

Members hand out phone numbers freely, and taking one commits nobody to anything. Calling somebody between meetings is the thing the number is for. Taking a couple is better than taking none.

What is a home group?

A home group is the one meeting somebody commits to, out of all the ones they attend. The commitment is to show up and to help with the running of the room. The idea is worth knowing about and not worth worrying about.

What happens before and after a meeting?

Coffee is the excuse and conversation is the actual activity. Rooms empty gradually, and the last people out often stack the chairs. Members made their friends in the time either side of the hour.

What if the meeting time has changed?

A meeting that has folded can stay in circulation for months afterward. A second meeting in the same area is the usual insurance against a wasted trip. Most of the time the listing holds and the door is open.